I’m a firm believer that the habits we form early stay with us.

Young kids thrive on routines and familiarity, which is why I am so thankful we developed good habits early on that continue to help my now 8-year-old balance wellness and school life. Ever since she was little, I have been pretty strict about sleep, and it has really paid off thanks to the routines we set.

Now that she’s in the third grade, the time she spends outside our home is longer and she’s left with just a few hours to recharge, relax, and do school stuff before it’s time for bed again. Here is the well-rounded after-school routine that enables our daughter to have 10 hours of sleep.

My daughter Monica’s non-negotiable has always been reading and relaxing time. Usually, as soon as she gets home, she freshens up, grabs her favorite non-sugary snacks, then heads to her room to read. I love that in this span of time, she’ll just stay in her room, lie on her bed or relax on her bean bag, and munch on snacks while enjoying her book of choice.

I feel like this part of the routine really helps her recharge and decompress since school can be overwhelming and overstimulating. Just like adults, kids need space and time to breathe too. During these moments, I don’t bother her with questions about school, her day, or anything else. I learned to respect her time just as she respects mine.

Once she’s done with her “me time,” she’ll either play the piano or spend time with some of her toys. Since she doesn’t play with a lot of toys anymore, this part of her day is dedicated to moving around the house. When she was younger, she used to spend this time playing outside. But now that she spends longer time at school, she uses her “physical time” to either chat and cuddle with us, help with chores, or tidy up her own room.

Movement is still crucial to ensure she uses up her energy properly, and it’s also important for her physical development.

My daughter doesn’t spend much time on schoolwork or studying anymore. Personally, I don’t want her to spend too much time reviewing or doing school activities unless she tells me she wants to do it. For us, the time she spends at school is already enough. Thankfully, her school rarely assigns homework or projects. So, this time is mainly used to make sure all her stuff are ready for the next day, to ensure she doesn’t miss anything, or to review if quizzes and exams are coming up.

Monica has developed her own study strategy and habit; she writes down what she learns at school as a way to recall and review. This approach has worked well for her, especially when it comes to quizzes and exams. While I know that spending more time on schoolwork might be necessary in the future, at her age, I don’t think it’s essential yet. Maybe we’ll adjust when she’s older; but for now, I’d rather follow her pace and help her build a positive relationship with studying, rather than her resenting it later because she’s had too much of it too soon.

At around 5:30 PM, Monica starts having dinner. By this time, everything else is done: we’re usually finished with work, and this is when we catch up the most. I think it’s really important for us to know what happened during her school day and what made her happy or sad.

She then freely shares what went on—what happened at school, what the teachers said, or anything else on her mind. Like they always say, communication is key, and I believe that having these conversations during mealtime is a great way to keep that connection.

Her dinner is not very heavy, but we make sure it’s healthy. We also do our best not to give more sweets or any sugary treats. This way, we can be sure that she won’t be hyper and won’t have trouble sleeping later on.

As soon as she’s done eating, she’ll head straight for a bath and get ready for a good night’s sleep. Her daddy will read aloud to her—yes, even at 8 years old. They go through two books: one storybook and one devotion book. This has been their routine ever since Monica was little.

We also make sure that screen time is zero, especially close to bedtime, since we believe it doesn’t help calm the mind and body (this applies to adults too—note to self). After that, I’ll sometimes give her a massage and then cuddle with her until she falls asleep. At this point, the room is dark, she has her precious stuffed toy, and everything else should be hushed.

Her bedtime is between 7:00 and 7:30 PM, which gives her a solid 9-10 hours of sleep.

Developing this kind of routine helps us make sure Monica has a restful night after a long day. I’ve noticed that when she gets enough sleep, she eats, plays, and studies better. Honestly, good sleep just makes her a happier child, and it helps keep her from getting sick. Sleep is so crucial, especially for kids who are still developing their bodies and minds.

I’m not saying our daily lives are always as consistent as I’ve described. There are days when we have a ton of work, when Monica has too much energy to burn, or when she just prefers to be inactive—and that’s okay. The key is to get back to our routine and try to stick with it.

This approach works best for us. It’s not always easy, but every time we see Monica growing up happy and healthy, it makes us feel like we’re doing parenting right.