The past week has been very eventful for the Philippines. The news stories about dismissed mayor Alice Guo’s fan-meet-like arrest, preacher and FBI-most-wanted Apollo Quiboloy’s surrender after months of being at large, and incumbent Vice President Sara Duterte’s evasion of senate probes and budget hearings have been consistently leaving a bitter taste in everyone’s mouth.

The truth is it’s not just us parents and guardians who are affected. While we indulge in airing our frustrations through comments or memes, our teenage kids who are starting to understand the world around them a little more, see prominent adults who are getting their way out of their misbehaviors in broad daylight.

Have we really thought about what happens to our kids when they see misbehaving adults?

From the moment our kids explore the world in their toddler years, it’s us adults who shape their sense of right and wrong through our words and actions. So when kids eventually see us breaking the rules we set, do we expect them to just forget about it?

When Alice Guo made up stories in the senate hearings to prove her Filipino descent or to explain how she recently fled the Philippines, she isn’t standing up for herself. She is showing our kids that they can lie to have the upper hand in a difficult situation.

And worse, will they aim to be older and more prominent too, all for the wrong reasons?

When our kids unintentionally spill their milk or break a glass, we adults leave no stones unturned. We exhaust all our parenting strategies from remaining calm and teaching empathy to using the age-old “Can we talk?” and probing endlessly just so we find our answers and get to the bottom of the issue.

When preacher Apollo Quiboloy went into hiding to escape the harsh claws of justice, he wasn’t just keeping himself “safe.” He was showing our kids that they can eventually use their power and resources to delay facing the consequences of their actions.

Although we now live in a generation when parents try their best to break generational trauma, some kids still live in a home where they’re not allowed to speak against adults because “they’re just kids”, or they’re not allowed to meddle with adult affairs because “they won’t understand it yet.”

In this very unfortunate case, who can provide answers to kids’ questions that are crucial in forming their beliefs and identity?

In this age of modern parenting, we can easily read up and learn anytime, anywhere about what to do when our kids throw tantrums. But when we adults throw tantrums and resort to anger, pass the blame, and excuse ourselves from all accountabilities when things don’t go our way, our kids don’t Google. Instead, they carry the burden of solely processing their emotions after their once-role-model’s image shatters right before their eyes.

When Vice President Sara Duterte responded to senate probes in a manner unbecoming of a public servant, she wasn’t just dodging questions of national importance. When she chose not to attend the succeeding budget hearing, she didn’t just vacate her seat in a hall. In these two situations and more, she was showing our kids that they can twist everyone’s arm by throwing tantrums, and they can blatantly disrespect existing rules or processes.

Adults are humans too, and humans commit mistakes. But to hurt people, avoid accountability, and evade justice under this premise is a lame excuse. It goes against human values and universal laws we want our children to learn and follow.

Adults who avoid responsibility make a strong statement that only the young and vulnerable are answerable to their wrongdoings, and the older and “more powerful” ones can be forgiven.

We adults should clean up after the mess we created. We can’t lie, hide, or cry our way out. We face the consequences, or we leave our kids and families with deep wounds to indefinitely heal from.