“Ang dami na namang ganap…”

I used to really look forward to the holiday season—the long break filled with get-togethers, gift-giving, and festivities. But as I got older and took on more responsibilities, especially when I became a mom – everything started to change. Suddenly, that excitement I used to feel turned into stress and anxiety. Since I don’t want to be in the “Most Wonderful Time of the Year” in that state, I learned to say “no” and protect my peace.

Here are five things I did to avoid burnout while still celebrating the true spirit of the season. I hope you can take a thing or two for a more peaceful holiday!

I still remember how the holidays felt when I was a kid—eagerly anticipating gifts, wearing new clothes my mom saved up for us, and playing nonstop. Now, I’m on the other side of it all, planning, buying, and ensuring everything is meaningful and memorable.

My top priority is making the holiday season special for my husband and daughter. Now it’s us parents who are creating the memories for our daughter to cherish when she grows up.

Over the years, I’ve learned that making a list is the best way to avoid feeling overwhelmed by everything that is happening. To keep the holidays special, I think carefully about what we can truly accommodate and learn to say “no” to anything that might drain us. I plan ahead, taking our work and office schedules into account and building from there.

When I was younger, I used to say yes to almost any invite. I’d even organize some myself. But then, it has become a chore I need vacation from. I know and have always believed that if I really want to make time for something, I’ll find a way. For the longest time, that’s exactly what I did—juggling every meet-up and get-together. But as I got older, I started stressing on it too much; maybe because I have too many things to think about and consider? Or I guess it’s just me feeling the burnout.

Constantly saying yes to every lunch, dinner, and catch-up made me less excited about the season. So, I started being a little more intentional, saying yes only to plans made ahead of time or ones that actually fit into our schedule. It might seem like we’re being picky or sensitive or just plainly avoiding people, but honestly, it’s just about conserving energy. That way, we’re able to focus on what matters most and make the time we spend with people much more meaningful.

Let me start by saying that if you want and you are able to give gifts to everyone and it makes you happy, go for it! Giving gifts is a lovely part of the season, especially for kids who get so much joy from it. I used to make a list way in advance, but over time, as responsibilities piled up at work and at home, that long list became shorter, and getting excited about gift giving took a backseat.

I used to feel a bit guilty about it, but then I realized that I’m actually okay with not receiving gifts myself. We also taught our daughter that presence is more important than presents.

So, if you’re on a budget, or if you’re giving gifts out of habit or because you feel you have to, I’d say maybe think more about it. Be more intentional about who you give to, and let it come from a place of happiness. Sometimes, just being there for each other means more than any wrapped gift ever could.

In our little family, we’ve made a tradition of spending Christmas Eve and New Year’s Eve with just the three of us at home. Then, on the day itself, we visit each side of the family. While we love celebrating with everyone, we’ve found a special kind of peace and happiness when it’s just us. We cook what we want, go to mass, and just enjoy each other’s company. It’s something our daughter has grown up with and looks forward to every year.

Starting last year, we added a new twist—going out of town during Christmas week. We felt it was more meaningful to make memories just for us, something our daughter can hold onto in her memory bank. This year, we’re even more excited because we’re flying out of the country!

So I’d say – it’s totally okay to make new traditions. Do what will benefit your little family.

It’s okay if you don’t have a vacation planned, if there are no reunions to go to, or if you just want to rest through the whole holiday break. After all, the reason we have this time is to sincerely and genuinely celebrate the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ. Everything else—the gatherings, the gifts, the traditions—are just extras. So it’s perfectly okay to spend this time in whatever way feels right to honor the true meaning of the season.

More often than not, this last hoorah of the year is the one with the longest break from school and work, yet it has become the busiest. I understand that this is the only time we could all be together after a whole year of hustling; but let us not overstretch ourselves, let’s leave some space for us to breathe. The last thing we like is to feel drained with this kind of break; instead let’s focus on creating more meaningful memories and connections.

And as we all evolve and experience different stages in our lives, may we all celebrate this season with less pressure either from the things we see on Social Media or the ‘common’ things we used to experience. Have a merry and happy holidays to all, especially to us, mamas. We got this!