Your toddler’s first day of school is almost always full of tears. If you’ve never been there, you’re most likely feeling all the jitters as the day comes closer.
Relax, Moms and Dads. The truth is, your first time at school drop-off might be a lot easier than you imagine. Mom of one and former guidance counselor Michelle Aquino-Tulalian shares her mind on what you really need to know about a difficult drop-off, and how you can handle it like a pro!
School gates and hallways bear witness to tears and tantrums on the first day or week of school.
As a former guidance counselor, Mommy Michelle recalls that the first day of school in the preschool level is always “a battle of push and pull.” She even sees some kids resorting to complaining of sudden tummy aches just so they have a “valid reason” their parents won’t leave.
According to her, the reason behind this is culture shock.
In order to reduce the impact of culture shock, here’s what she suggests you do:
The home is a familiar and safe space for your kids, but it doesn’t mean that they will never be able to feel the same in a new environment. This is why Mommy Michelle encourages parents to bring kids to the school’s Open House or trial classes if available.
Children are not “too young” or “too old” for a sit-down talk. The important factor to consider here is time. Take time to explain and open the floor for questions and clarifications. Make your child feel he is heard and valued.
Mommy Michelle also suggests you highlight what makes the school a great place to be, such as making new friends and participating in fun activities!
Parents of school-aged children are not new to this experience, and they have long applied strategies to help manage difficult drop-offs. It won’t hurt if you try one or more of these for yourself and your kid, too.
One of these strategies is to prepare something tangible to give your child that would make them remember you. According to Mommy Michelle, “Ideally, it could be something that is wearable or they could hold which would make your presence felt by them.”
As for the personalized goodbye routine, Mommy Michelle reminds parents to keep it short and sweet.
Having a short goodbye routine does not equate to leaving your kid right away. Note that it could blow up your kid’s culture shock.
Your hello routine at pick up is as important as your goodbye routine at drop off. Avoid telling your kid right away that you’re in a hurry to go home; they are excited to see you pick them up, so better welcome this as an opportunity to talk about their day.
Mommy Michelle advises that you observe how your kid “delightfully tell stories of what happened in school.” This may be part of your after-school routine while having snacks at home or at a much later time – dinner for example – so that everyone’s properly rested.
Like many other adjustments concerning your kids, drop-offs are not going to be walks in the park. This is why Mommy Michelle strongly suggests to repeat scenarios of first day of school “especially during long breaks.”
Helping your child transition also means that you may be seeing repeated crying bouts. Gather yourself and try not to worry so much. Your kid’s feelings are valid, and affirm the feeling by being calm and collected.
