Husbands, Here’s How You Can Ease Your Wife’s Mental Load

A mom wakes up every morning with a running to-do list. On most days, you don’t see her just seated in one corner. You find her literally in different parts of the house, ticking as many invisible boxes as she can. When her body’s physically at rest, her mind races to the next task. It’s a never-ending process.

While you see her as a strong woman who can singlehandedly finish her tasks, she does need a pick-me-up any time of the day. (Yes, even on those days when she says she can do things on her own!) For her, there’s always this feeling of an imminent head explosion due to the overwhelming tasks, as a wife, mom, career woman, and homemaker. So husband, this is where you come in and try your best to ease her mental load!

We know how challenging it is to tiptoe on a situation when you’re unsure of what to do. We’ve come up with a list of tips with hopes that will help you be the best partner your wife needs on her difficult days!

Husbands, Here's How You Can Ease Your Wife's Mental Load

Make her morning cup of coffee When your wife is a mom, remember that there’s no clocking in and out of motherhood. The moment she gets up in the morning, her work begins – and there’s just no end to it! Give your wife a lift by intentionally attending to her non-negotiables without taking time off her, such as making her morning cup of coffee. It pays to know how she starts her day! Trust us, she’s going to appreciate the gesture!

Relieve her of small tasks for the time being Nope – this is not to make a spoiled or entitled wife for the rest of your life. This is for moments you see on her face that there’s just a lot on her plate. This is for days you don’t feel the high spirits in your partner. The task may be too small or too simple for you such as washing the cup you need on the sink, but that small task has the tendency to throw her off her course for the day. Do her a favor and do it yourself, at least for the meantime.

Set aside time for the two of you This might be difficult with a newborn, with kids, or with a packed schedule, but both of you should never be too busy to set aside time for each other. This special time doesn’t need to be long, too! It only needs to be intentional and heartfelt. Sincerely ask your wife how her day has been or where she could possibly need your help. There are days when she just needs a listening ear, and you’re the best person to provide her with that – so go ahead and be there.

Offer to do errands If you will be passing by the water station on your way to work, kindly do the errand. If you will be passing by the grocery on the way home, ask your wife if there’s anything she needs. Her head might be hovering over this task for a while and she just can’t attend to it for days on end, so if it’s not much of a hassle for you, initiate and offer to do it. This, for her, is already a big thing.

Surprise her Surprises aren’t just for birthdays and Mother’s Day. As a wife, she thinks of you. As a mom, she thinks of your kids. As a homemaker, she thinks of your household. You often hear that surprises don’t have to be grand, and it’s still true in this case! That pasalubong for her from a little brown bag would spell out you’re thinking of her, too. It’ll be a warm hug and her way of pausing to smile after a long day of thinking or worrying.

Let her sleep some more A little more sleep can do wonders for your wife’s mental load. Allow her to indulge for 10 to 30 more minutes of sleep, and if an hour is possible, that’s a lot better! Remind her that maybe she doesn’t need to be up so early, or if you’re home for the entire day, remind her that you’re there to help her with what she needs to do. A morning like this would set her good mood for the day!

Shower her with words of appreciation The never-ending tasks in your wife’s head can easily bring her down and make her feel drained even before all her tasks commence. Be generous with appreciating her using your words. Most of the time, the simple and straightforward, “Thank you for [this/that]” does the magic of relieving her from the heavy mental load she has.


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