Newly married or not, your in-laws can be intimidating and (let’s be honest,) a bit scary. Yes, they’re family now, but if you’re still looking for tips to help steer your relationship to better waters or just score some nice points with them, then we’ve got you covered! Here are six tips that can help you build better relationships with your in-laws.
1. Be the frequent party guest…
Remember that get-together your sister-in-law invited you to? What about the family reunion last month where your hubby couldn’t go so you decided to stay home too? Attending all (or a LOT) of family events is a very basic tip that can get you a long way in the in-laws’ eyes. Showing up to family functions (even if your hubby can’t make it) shows them that you care about the family and their lives. Yes, it’s about showing them that you have feelings and that you care.
2. And the hostess too
If you can be the party guest, you can definitely be the hostess too. Your kid’s birthday party? Of course you’ll invite them. But score even more points with your in-laws by making them feel welcome in your home. You can host a Sunday lunch at your place, or invite your nieces and nephews for a play date with your kids. Just try to avoid the awkward hand-waving, okay?
3. Keep in touch
For in-laws abroad or hard to get to, keep in touch with them. Have a weekly or monthly phone call, send newsy emails with pictures of your kids, and generally update them on your family’s lives. Not only will they feel involved in your life, but they’ll love catching up too! Plus, you can get in on all their news too!
4. Channel your inner Aretha Franklin
Yup, that’s right, R.E.S.P.E.C.T. If you have in-laws you don’t see eye to eye with, just acknowledge the way they do things or think, and accept that both of you have different ways of doing things. No need to have an argument that will cause drama!
5. Don’t play the comparison game
“This is how we do it in my family” is not something your in-laws would want to hear. Try not to compare your side with your spouse’s side, and keep the peace. (You don’t need a family feud!)
6. When seeking advice, don’t chicken out of asking them
Trust us, your in-laws will love being asked for advice. Whether it be your wise mother-in-law or older sister-in-law, we’re sure they’ll be able to give you lots of things to think about. So stop thinking about how scary it’ll be; instead think: You can do it.
Just remember that our in-laws are there to help, guide, and support us. And even though there may be times when we find them intimidating, they’re actually family. Who knows? Maybe your in-laws are actually intimidated by you! So go on, take the initiative and get those in-laws to love you. They probably already do.